He failed miserably.

http://www.addictinginfo.org/2013/04/17/homophobic-lawmakers-attempt-to-make-sodomy-and-oral-sex-illegal-fails-miserably/

Thank you Internet

Anyone doing anything special?

I loved this video, although not for its intended purposes. This inoffensive, rough gem is filmed with soft focus lenses, and stars India Summer and Marco Banderasas they cavort on a fuzzy blanket amongst lit candles. Dr. Ava’s purring, seductive voice guides us through each scene and oral sex technique, but I couldn’t stop laughing at her voice overs. I don’t know what a “better” alternative is, but the delivery is so very clinical and romantic. Read the rest of HotMoviesForHer’s review here.

Exercise more than your mouth.

This video isn’t the best quality, but it is totally worth watching. I have gone on rants and written many advice articles on ways to initiate oral sex and I always advise against any head pushing, unless of course you know your partner is into it. Nicole Sullivan and Michael McDonald’s performance in this MADtv clip is near to my heart regarding such matter. And hilarious!

“I tend to respond to these concerns in two equally important ways: first, that many people find giving pleasure very arousing and second, that there are lots of ways to give back. People often assume that the quid pro quo is oral sex for oral sex, but that makes some assumptions about what your partner may want. Whether it’s a new flame or someone you know very well, asking what makes them feel good yields some very useful information and shows that you care about actually making them feel good instead of just adhering to a sexual script.”

Some folks genuinely just enjoy giving oral sex with no desire to get anything any return.  Never assume this is the case, though.  After receiving a life changing blow job or pussy licking, don’t just go straight for a high-five and a snack.  Ask if you can go down on them or what they would like/want you to do to them.  Also, don’t get upset if they won’t let you “return the favor.”  Don’t take it as a blow to your ego.  Know that they genuinely benefited from performing oral sex on you and you aren’t less of a person for not giving them.  Feeling bad will only take away from the awesome experience you just shared.  Your concern for their pleasure will be appreciated and hot.

Moral of the story:  Communicate then reciprocate.  Appropriately.

The thought is that a new life is forming inside of you and foreign substances are helping the little creature along the way.  These foreign substances may not agree with the bun in the oven.  If the sperm/familiar substance that helped get that life started is ingested, order is restored everyone feels all warm and fuzzy.  I have never been pregnant (thank you sweet baby Jesus) so I have no way of knowing if this actually works.  I’d love to hear from some of you baby bumpin’ ladies out there to find out if swallowing after oral sex eases the A.M. tummy ache.

Get the details on the morning sickness healing powers of oral sex on yourtango.com.

Look, you can spend your life playing games and hoping you’ll get what you want, but you can avoid such nonsense and simply ask for it.  If you really enjoy receiving oral sex and you’re not getting it, perhaps it is time to open up a dialogue.  It may be as simple as telling your partner that you love having your pussy licked.  Perhaps they need to be reminded that, while you love intercourse, oral sex bring about intense orgasms or just serve as foreplay.  I realize that bringing up such subjects can be uncomfortable, but growing a pair and facing it can help avoid your dissatisfaction and possibly relationship issues.  A fulfilling sex life is worth a few minutes or hours of awkwardness.

It is possible that your partner feels questionable about their oral skills and prefers to avoid it completely rather than not appear confident between your legs.  To ease their fears, you can offer to coach them through and tell them what you like.  You help him to help you and you get to level up in the intimacy department.  Communicating is sexy!  Chances are, he wants to please you and will feel really good once you lead him down the right path.

You can walk around expecting people to know what you need from them, but that is a sure fire way to go through life unsatisfied and bitter.  This is true in all areas of life, but the least you can do is ask your partner to put his or her mouth on your vagina.  Enough with the games!

P.S. I apologize if you are offended by the heterocentricity if this post.  This advice applies to everyone regardless of gender, sexual preference and parts.  Since a hetero female inspired this, I used the corresponding language.