Many individuals we have spoken to lately have expressed concerns about how oral sex should occur between two people for the first time. More specifically, how one should ask for oral sex without knowing if their partner even likes giving and/or receiving it. Our answer to this classic sexual conundrum is fairly simple.
Take control of your questions.
Basic strategy dictates one must have information before making a decision. Therefore, someone needs to make a move toward oral sex before an answer can be obtained. We understand this may be more difficult and uncomfortable for the more submissive varieties, but fear has no place in the bedroom. Communication, whether via spoken word or obvious body language, is key to having the best oral sex possible with any individual. So, if you’re not getting any of the signals you need, gently force the issue.
Now, the use of “gently” is very important in this oral sex tip. We are not condoning grabbing someone by the back of the head, and thrusting your genitals in their face before they can react. Make your gestures blatant, but easy to respond to.
For example:
“Donny and Dana have just returned after meeting for the first time at their local bar, and are continuing a spirited make-out session whilst coming through the front door. Donny shuts the door behind him, and the frisky duo falls to the carpet. Dana undoes Donny’s belt and smiles at him while taking hold of his erection. Getting more and more turned on, Donny then passes over Dana’s legs and straddles her chest to present himself for fellatio.”
…. ERRRRRR – WRONG: Stop on a Whammy!
Although this move can be very good for couples who are already comfortable with their boundaries, there is no way Donny could have known if Dana likes to give fellatio. He just shoved his thing in her face, hoping for the positive side of a 50/50 chance. Let’s rewind a bit and see if there is a better way for Donny to proceed.
“Donny and Dana have just returned after meeting for the first time at their local bar, and are continuing a spirited make-out session whilst coming through the front door. Donny shuts the door behind him, and the frisky duo falls to the carpet. Dana undoes Donny’s belt and smiles at him while taking hold of his erection. Getting more and more turned on, Donny wraps his arms around Dana and rolls her to the top. Dana giggles a bit while slowly rotating her hips, and Donny runs his fingers through her hair. He tilts his head sideways, letting Dana kiss down his neck, and says, “If you wanted to kiss lower, I would return the favor.” Dana responds by kissing down Donny’s stomach, and takes him into her mouth for the best blowjob he has ever experienced.”
Ding Ding Ding!
This time around, Donny’s actions gave Dana ample time to refuse giving oral sex. Not only did this make Dana more comfortable with Donny as an oral sex partner, but it also most likely “sealed the deal” for him getting any further than where the first oral sex scenario ended. Keep your partners’ right to their decisions in mind, and you will find much more willing oral sex in your future.
